Avoiding the inevitable invective against Government policy and taxation of the working man's place of refuge, I am just going to tell you that this former pub is located in the village of Warehorne, which is located near the larger village of Hamstreet, which is located near the town on Ashford which is located around 55 miles southeast of that big place called London.
I recently achieved something I'd planned to do for years, and this was to visit all four of the Wonder's 'twin pubs.' I remember discussing with the landlord the notion of completing this challenge by bike in a single day a few years ago. Sadly I only visited one of these by bike in the end.
The most southerly of these pubs is The Ship at Lade (pictured), tucked away in a back-street just off of the road along the Southeastern Kent coast between the seaside villages of Greatstone to Lydd-on-Sea - basically almost France, were it not for the water in between. This pub has been redundant for many years, and I took a mosey up there some years ago for the obligatory photo that I have since lost.
In November last year I set out to visit a pub of the lesser-spotted 'open' variety. I caught the train up to Swanley and set off on my bike along what must surely be the longest station access road in Kent! I followed the B-road to Dartford via Hextable. The scenery between the built-up areas reminded me of East Kent, consisting of expansive open fields.
I found my way to the centre of Dartford via a signed detour for bikes. Having been to Liverpool, the home of The Beatles, many times, I was profoundly disappointed by the former hometown of Mick Jagger. I could find no reference to either Jagger or the Rolling Stones in the town centre. I had expected a statue of Mr Jagger complete with pouting lips somewhere in the town and I thought at least one enterprising individual would have opened an alehouse called 'Jagger's Bar' and adorned it with replica gold discs and framed photographs of the group, but like Sir Mick, I got no satisfaction. I have since learned that there is a blue plaque commemorating the place where Jagger and Richards first met at Dartford railway station.
Dartford did however have a bustling market in its high street (as opposed to flinging it out as far as possible as though allergic to such trading like the similarly Kentish town of Ashford). I wheeled my bike past the impenetrable crowds and on via a pleasant park.
The town itself seemed dearly in need of some of its most famous ex-resident's money, but the park was pleasant enough. My aim now was to attempt to follow the River Darent southward. I rode some suburban roads and then found a footpath which brought me out via meadows onto the A225 near the A2 bridge. Just beyond this, in the village of Hawley, was the Papermaker's Arms. I chained up my bike and ventured inside.
The young barman was fascinated when I showed him the picture of the 'Wonder' on my village's hiking page on the Internet. This reminded me of the boy in the film 'A.I.' finding out that he was actually one of many identical models. However, where the boy in the film was devastated, this barman was overjoyed to discover that the pub was one of five!
After supping a local ale, I continued and turned off of the main road to go through the villages of South Darenth and Horton Kirby. The healthy quota of pubs in these Darent Valley villages was nothing short of impressive.
I eventually came out onto the A20 at Farningham and continued along the A225 to picturesque Eynsford where I watched a Landrover splash its way through the ford. Beyond the station, I took a lane to Lullingstone and rode a path by the river, northward again so I could look at the castle. I stood at the impressive arched gatehouse, admiring the stately home across the lawn, before continuing again. A little further, the Roman Villa seemed to be located inside a modern building, designed to preserve it. I feared a fee of some kind (although I was recently impressed by the Roman mosaic situated within the park at St Albans which can be viewed free of charge), and returned to the A225 heading south, making a detour to the village of Shoreham on the lanes, where I counted four pubs. Four!
My ride ended in another village, Otford, where I caught the train home and it wasn't until May 8th 2015 that I returned to the challenge. This time I had my fiancée in tow, having attended our legal preliminary meeting to marrying at Maidstone registry office. Yes, it's complex to marry somebody from outside the EU, although bizarrely if she was marrying somebody from outside the UK but from within the EU and living in the UK, none of the red tape would apply. Like most things in life, this simple meeting expanded to fill our day, as we had make a lightening-speed trip back home (around thirty miles away) in order to return with the photographs and additional line in our 'proof of residency' letter that they hadn't told us we needed.
We were pretty shattered after this and a little drive along to Barming to check out The Redstart Inn seemed to be the perfect tonic. Inside, the bar was lively and I kept hearing words like 'Miliband' and 'Farage.' I guess the recent election had meant a change from the usual pub 'staples' of conversations like football and smut! This particular 'Wonder' was up a quiet residential lane. There was a village feel here, in spite of being on the edge of Maidstone, one of Kent's largest towns.
Our final 'Wonder' would be just a photo, as The Bell at Coxheath is now an Indian restaurant, and dinner was waiting for us at home. This former pub stands beside the east/west B-road in the village centre which has a semi-urban feel. It's even got a set of traffic lights!
So, having completed this challenge a few years behind schedule, I'll leave you to ponder the merits of checking out more of my travel writing on Amazon Kindle or vowing never to waste time on this blog again. If your view is the former, the book 'Mud Sweat and Beers' by Adam Colton may be of interest.
